Introvert is always a word I've fought against. It's not that I didn't want to be one or felt an aching need to be an extrovert, it's more that I always felt like I was being pushed into this box that I didn't always feel like I fit into. By definition, an introvert is 'a person who tends to turn inward mentally'. I always struggled with this definition because I felt like labelling myself was erasing the parts of my personality which are loud and outspoken. Over time, I've realised that the labels of introvert and extrovert aren't as rigid as I'd once thought they were. Introverts with extrovert tendencies exist (hiya) as do extroverts with introvert tendencies.

Nonetheless, as I've met a wide variety of extroverts and introverts throughout my life, I have come to the realisation that the majority of the time I do fall into the latter. There's a hell of a lot of things that extroverted people enjoy doing which I just look at in awe. I wish I could enjoy them and I wish I was the type of person who felt recharged by being surrounded by people, but I'm just not. I like being alone, I enjoy relaxed social situations much more than festivals or big nights out and my dream evening is Netflix and pizza on the sofa. I've tried to fit in with an extroverted lifestyle, but it just hasn't worked for me.

Through a lot of conscious thinking about this, here are 5 things that I've learnt from being an introvert.

It's not all Netflix and chill 
Introverts seem to have this weird image of always being in a blanket fort, in their room, terrified to walk out of the door and come into contact with another person. Of course, some introverts do have days like this, but as I said - there is a spectrum. For me, I define myself as an introvert because I need those Netflix in bed days in between the days where I'm out there socialising and being a functioning member of society. Introverts vary, but I've discovered about myself that I can totally nail extrovert social situations as long as I have breather days in the middle to wind down. Basically, I'm pretty good at hopping between the two.

Extroverts and fellow introverts both make great company
Some of my closest friends are introverted people like me who operate on the same 'extroversion is cool as long as I can have a break sometimes' level. However, I also have a lot of close friends who are 100% extroverted and couldn't think of anything worse than a night at home. These types of people used to scare me, but I've learnt that a mixture of extroversion and introversion within your friendship groups is actually pretty handy. It means you've got people who are happy to take breaks and then meet up again like nothing has changed, as well as people who will coax you out of your comfort zone every now and then.

Introverts can hide on the internet
Is anybody an introvert on the internet? Is that even possible? I know I'm definitely not. The internet is the one place that you can express yourself and scream into the void without worrying that you're taking up too much space or over-analysing peoples expressions. Your internet persona and your real life persona can be incredibly different, especially when you're introverted. In fact, I'd say introverted people are often more loud and proud on the internet because it's the one place where we feel comfortable enough to revel in a little bit of attention.

Being alone is a like a party for one
Being an introvert has taught me to become a master of one of my favourite skills: the ability to enjoy your own company. Whether it's a day at home getting work done or a day out in London on my own, I've learnt a skill of how to spend time by myself without getting bored or feeling the need to connect with other people. To me, this has allowed me to feel more comfortable with myself and build up a relationship with me that I never used to have. I think that when you can be content with spending time alone, you learn how to feel a little bit happier with who you are.

Sometimes you'll surprise yourself
One of the biggest revelations I've learnt through being an introvert, is that some days you'll wake up and that just won't be who you are. It doesn't happen to me often, but some days I wake up and just don't feel like that version of myself. Being an introvert with extrovert tendencies means that some days I do completely contradict myself and start to lean more towards to extroverted side. If you ever find yourself desperate to go out for drinks with your friends or wanting to make spontaneous plans instead of sitting at home alone all day, then you're probably a little bit like me too. Sometimes, your extroverted tendencies will surprise you, but in true introvert style, you may be due a little recharge day shortly after.

I'd love to know whether you see yourself as an introvert, an extrovert or somewhere in the middle. Let me know in the comments!


  1. Lauren I totally relate to this post, and throughly enjoyed reading it! I'm an introvert but I'm slowly learning that I do need to be around people for at least most parts of the day, I need my own downtime but I like to talk to other people or I feel quite down and secluded xxx

    1. I'm glad I'm not the only one Natalie - thank you for reading! I'm exactly the same as you xx

  2. Love this post, Lauren! I relate to it a lot - I also get pushed into the introvert box, mainly because I'm quite quiet and shy, but I need time with people as well as time alone. I'd still say I was more of an introvert than an extrovert, though. I guess it's just about finding the right balance for you! xx


    1. Thanks so much Beth! Balance is definitely key!xx

  3. I'm an introvert too. I am working as an au pair in Spain atm which sounds crazy for an introvert but I guess I am brave. I love my alone time but I also need time with people too or else I get lonely. I also prefer to only have a few close friends rather than lots of fake friends.